THE SALARY CONSPIRACY :BY CHRISTOPHER NAICCA

DEC,2006: `I appreciate parliament's generous gesture to reward me a higher salary. However I am forced to decline the offer as I empathise with other hardworking and struggling Kenyans…'Thus read Kibaki's speech in part. And it reminded me of the story of the fox. `I'll take care of it' said the fox when he was given the key to the hen house. President Kibaki is taking us for fools. If he calls his political cronies `mavi ya kuku' and wapumbavu. If that is what he calls his driver, what do you think he calls us Kenyans. That is why he can conjure an elaborate plan to hoodwink Kenyans. That he has declined to take up a salary increase is laughable and can only be meant for wapumbavu's. This has conspiracy written all over it. Like a game of chess, Kibaki used his pawns to front something for him. Then made his killing move. And Kenyans from all walks of life (as they like to put it) cheered and lauded the move. The motion to increase the president's salary came from the government. From the executive to be precise. And in circumstances such as these, where the exchequer will require upto Kshs 1.3 billion to meet the proposed increases yearly, approval for such a motion ordinarily comes from the president. So today's editorial in the Nation congratulating the president for turning down the increase is nothing but a farce. Here is the theory. The executive meets in statehouse. Matha Karwa suggests that the public is disillusioned by parliaments' insensitivity as regards salary. President says its not his fault, its parliament. Karwa points out that Kenyans cant tell the difference. To them, the President has allowed it to happen. President says wapumbavu. Tunju suggests that the President should do something to give the public an impression that he does not support the arbitrary salary increases. Sitoti says that would be good considering that striking lecturers got nothing. So Karwa suggest that the govt proposes an increase for the president. Which the President will conveniently turn down. `Will the public buy that?' Kimuya asks. `Ndio. Ni wapumbavu kabisa.' Replies Prezzo. And the circus is then brought to us. Or what do you think NB/ Any name similarities with real life people is highly regretted.